fast friends

Honestly, I don’t want to get into the nonsense that’s happening with Budsie. Some general notes:
-He’s having a tricky time making friends. He’s being pushed around a bit, and has decided to respond by pushing back.  Needless to say, this hasn’t resulted in any strong ties.
-He is annoyed with everybody – “no one responds properly, Mummy. The other kids don’t make any sense. No one     understands me.” Sigh.
-He’s facing challenges with his gross and fine motor skills, which leads to kids picking on him, which leads to more tears at home.
-And he’s four, so he’s kind of a jerk. I mean he’s the kindest little boy – compassionate, sensitive, loving. But you know what I’m talking about – everything is a power struggle, from what he’ll consume (no brown things right now) to what order he puts his pajamas on (or whether he puts them on at all).

All in all, Budsie is in a bit of a rough patch. He has a terrible case of The Fours.

Now, had this rough patch happened last year, we would almost certainly be in crisis mode right now. Because trying to navigate the trials and tribulations of a sensitive, intelligent, anxious, and physical little boy by yourself (with A. of course) would be…wretched. And I do still feel overwhelmed at times by what’s happening with Budsie, by the steps we have to take over the next few months/years to help him, by the knowledge that I’m going to have to up my parenting game if he is going to make it through the next 14 years relatively emotionally intact. But my DEAR GODS this would be so much harder if I didn’t have the women I currently have in my life. I am completely surrounded by intelligent, thoughtful, honest women, some of whom live in Canada, but a growing number of whom are fast friends made here in Herzliya. When you consider the fact that most of us have only known each other for a year, it’s shocking how much support there is. I debriefed with a dear Belgian last night and felt a bit better. I woke up this morning feeling dreadful – how was Budsie going to get through this, can I even manage his needs, I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING – but within a couple of hours, I had talked to three women, one Aussie in particular, who managed to wash away all of the ick and inner turmoil with good coffee and straightforward conversation. By lunchtime, I had a plan, I had some tools I hadn’t thought of, and I felt good about what was coming. I felt emotionally relieved.

So I guess I just want to say thank you, Israel post, for the chance to meet these fantastic females. I’m not sure what I would have done without them.


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