>here comes the what now?

>

Right, so a little while ago, I received an email from an old friend in TO, letting me know that an ex of mine was getting married. I was with said ex for almost three years and let’s just say that the old friend might as well have told me that said ex was flying to the moon to eat cheese with john lennon and I would have been only slightly more surprised. Anyways, said ex got married this weekend. Lovely.

Has anyone ever seen When Harry met Sally? Of course you have. Because it’s one of the best romantic comedies of all time. Well. Do you remember the scene when Sally finds out that Joe is getting married and she’s all upset, but not because she wants to marry Joe because she doesn’t…indeed she doesn’t even like him anymore…but because when they were together, the reason they split up was because she wanted to get married and have kids and he said he didn’t. It just wasn’t for him. So they broke up and since that time, she had been telling herself that it wasn’t her, but that it had been the most he could give and that he didn’t want to marry anyone. Except she had been lying to herself. He just didn’t want to marry her.

Said ex is my Joe.

Because I don’t miss this person (beyond the odd passing thought of ‘I wonder what so and so is up to these days’), and I certainly don’t want to be with him. Good god I mean we broke up years ago, I’ve since been in two long term relationships – one absolute crap, the other still going and beautifully I might add – and really, the relationship with this person wasn’t exactly splendid. But at the time, it seemed like all that mattered in the world was having someone say that I was the one they wanted to come home to for…well not ever, because let’s be realistic but at least the foreseeable future. But said ex said to me, one thanksgiving after begging me to come see him in TO, that he just wasn’t the committing type, that he never would be, that he thought I was great but that he just could never settle. So I said I couldn’t really do this anymore and he said alrighty then and after a long drawn out mess, we stopped the whole thing. And I said to myself, well that was the most he could give.

So this past Saturday, he went and got married. To a nice girl who is everything to him and he to her. And that’s just wonderful. But I’m not going to lie. It’s irritating. I’m not sad like Meg Ryan. I have nothing to be sad about – as I say, I have A. and school and zoe and great friends etc. and honestly, I have never been happier in my whole short 27 and a bit years.

But it’s irritating.

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