>egad, it’s January 10th

What if I can’t find the stroller I want in time for Ewan’s arrival? And what if he doesn’t like the colour red (his likely room colour)?

This is what I woke up at 5:00am this morning to worry about. Seriously. As if I can do anything about these issues at that time. More to the point, as if these even are issues to worry about at 5:00am or any other time for that matter. Of course I will find the stroller I need and of course the kid won’t give two hoots about the room colour. Sensible words that were lost on me in the wee hours of today. When I had moved on from worrying about these things, I started in on the ‘What if we can’t find someone to marry us?’ worry and the ‘Oh man, I better get LD to book a block of hotel rooms’ worry. Around about 7:00, while LD lay peacefully sleeping next to me, I headed into the worry to end all worries – money. How the HELL are we going to afford all of this? By the time LD was awake at the sensible Sunday morning hour of 10:00am, I had worked myself into a right tizzy and was frantically trying to figure out how I was going to get my drivers license renewed this week (way past due because of the strike and now I’m worrying I won’t have a license in time to drive Ewan to the hospital when he gets some rare disease I’ve never heard of…), while at the same time wondering if Ewan has spina bifida (a regular worry for me…don’t ask me why) and if people are going to like the food at the wedding.


Mornings like these are becoming increasingly common…this is troubling. I don’t know what I would do without Andrew. He’s the one who calmly assures me that Ewan’s organs are likely all where they should be and that he will in fact be born with a head. He is also the one who reminds me that as long as we keep plugging away at it, the wedding will get planned and the house will get moved into. Sensible man.

I wish my new prenatal yoga dvds would arrive…I’m desperately in need of a good new stretch. And a nap…


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