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Would it be incredibly un-professional to put ‘coffee’ in the acknowledgements page of my thesis?

That is if I get to the acknowledgements page. You cannot acknowledge people or inanimate objects for their help in something that was never completed. I’m convinced that there is no end to this tunnel. I can’t see a light…I can’t even see a spark or a ray or anything. I’m going to be writing this thesis for the rest of my life. 75 years from now I’ll be contemplating the meaning of global civil society and staring at the same computer screen, hands permenantly frozen in the typing position and eyebrows permenantly furrowed. The screen will be long dead and the human race will be bursting into flames around me and I’ll be sitting there, staring.